The Card Game... IS LAUNCHED!

Dear Investment Card Game Consuming Public:

RIPKOFF INVESTMENT PARTNERS: THE CARD GAME HAS BEEN LAUNCHED!

(Well, okay actually the printer is  still finagling things for a few days while they double-check all the files... But in the meantime you can feel free to peruse our stuff and even order the game if you wish.)

While you're waiting, please feel free to view our launch movie! We paid a huge sum using the latest 16mm film technology to make these babies! Enjoy...

Yours sincerely,

Tim K Ripkoff

Chief Biz Dev
Ripkoff Investment Partners

The Circle of Life & Debt

Memo To Staff:

My operation's man, Jon C Ripkoff, has taken a little quiet time out of his busy schedule to give you all a few pearls of wisdom on the "circle of life... and debt". I suggest you pay attention.

These are the kind of things that matter in life.

(Somebody get me my cardiologist, damnit!)

TJ Ripkoff
Top Banana,
Ripkoff Investment Partners

Jon C Ripkoff Talks Candidly

It's been a year since I sent my operations man, Jon C Ripkoff, on an extended assignment from his field office. A man of many words, thoughts and ideas, Jon tells it straight... the way they used to before the corporate world succumbed to this bizarre disease of groupthink. Damn, it's hard to find good men like him...

Where's my cigar, gawdamnit!

TJ Ripkoff
Top Banana,
Ripkoff Investment Partners

Up In The Survey Crew!

John C Ripkoff and I came from the same neck of the woods... North Ontar-EYE-OH... In fact, John C did some work in land surveying, while I did work in lake surveying (of all things)... And we cut our teeth in work on these big, northern projects... before coming to The Big Smoke to make things happen.

Anyway, here is a great song that captures the spirit of these ventures up north...

 

This was a time when people made value in a company through blood, sweat and tears... Long gone days now...

Tim K Ripkoff

Chief Business Development

Ripkoff Investment Partners

Memo To Staff

Memo To Staff,

I know there are a lot of Bright Ideas floating around in this office now about "Big Data" and other stuff like that. Just want to point out that, as long as you're employed in the Ripkoff empire, you will not let those kind of newfangled whatzizs mesmerize you too much. Take it with a grain of salt.

Repeat: You WILL go down to the trenches and sample it with your own eyes.

You WILL get experts who know what needs be done down there - with no highfalutin' MBA abstraction bullshit.

You WILL listen to and learn from the kind of "war stories" you think are boring.

Yes I know Mr Ripkoff is disconnected from the rest of us, and somehow the news gets sweetened as it rises to the top of the Ripkoff Tower, but as long as I'm here, this ship will be run with an ear to the ground.

Very seriously,

Tim K Ripkoff,
Chief Business Development
Ripkoff Investment Partners

Heard About Your Sudden Transfer...

John C,

Heard about your sudden transfer from the Field Office. Where is it they sent you? I heard some place out in the boonies... One of Ripkoff's more remote operations, mining or something? Or maybe the branch office of some grey, depressing city? Or was it the Ripkoff Corporate Retreat on that unnamed secluded South Pacific Island?

I'm sure we'll catch up soon, and I'll find out then...

I guess Mr Ripkoff didn't appreciate the critical videos. Ah well... You know how I feel about him... and that.

Remember that dingy old Field Office they tore down in 1970? That one in that building that TJ told us was actually the very first office, Full Stop, of Ripkoff Investment Partners?... Until they moved to a new city in 1970. That very first field office was in Toronto. Today, the Ripkoff Head Office is located in... Jeez... I was just at a baseball game there, last week.

What I don't understand is how that you and I were still operating out of the Field Office for so long?

I remember how you told me that a company hits its high-water mark when it plants its first skyscraper, as our founder, Mr TJ Ripkoff did in 1959. I remember that really clearly... the Ripkoff Tower going up then.

It really does seem to have been the Ripkoff high mark.

Today people seem to think they can preserve life in some bottle... Fooling themselves that they will never die. They don't know how important it is: that you not only have your life, but also that you *eat* your life. They're too goddamn "safe" John C. Too fucking safe.

Anyway...

Here's a stiff shot to you John C,

Tim K

Ripkoff Stories - The Press Conference

Trip on over to the Ripkoff Youtube channel and you'll see the latest rigmarole my inferiors have hacked together... (I don't know where they get off saying this whole card game was my idea...)

Sincerely, TJ Ripkoff

American Car Companies Are Truck Companies

I was looking at last Friday's New York Times, Auto Sales Rise 3.7%, Lifted by Upturn in Home Construction. It was way the car companies were ranked in terms of sales; GM was first, Ford was second and Chrysler was third ahead which had greater sales.

Kickstarter? Not To Worry! We Eat Failure For Lunch!

To all those Little Internet Nothings out there who took the time to donate to our card game project on this new-fangled Kickstarter thing - the project which I had my subordinates set-up... I just want to personally thank you. It takes a lot of guts to stand up for something when you're the only one on the field. When you're one of the new guys, or the "early adopters" (they tell me that's what they're called now).

Anyway, not to worry. I have instructed my subordinates to keep pushing the word out on what's the good and what's the bad in the world of investment - through our fledgling Youtube channel, through my Facebook page, and through other means we have yet to dream up. Who knows, we may run Kickstarter again in a year, or we may find other ways to get the word out. I hate to use a cliché, but now more than ever we need to inject plain old-fashioned kick-it-in-the-ass horse sense into the business world. (Their heads all seem to be spinning now.)

Once more, my hearty appreciation, and keep your eyeballs planted here to see what comes next.

Now I have a very important call to take...

TJ Ripkoff

The Lure of Sports

In my recent talks with TJ Ripkoff he was scathing about the overinvestment in sports by otherwise sane and well run organizations. "Executives who plaster the names of their companies across stadiums (sic), arenas, and ballparks will be spending more time in the future watching games and overpaying for advertising."

I was shocked at his assertion that only the most successful and profitable companies can afford the naming right to whole sports facilities.

Hello Mr Ripkoff

My staff weren't up to snuff on the card game project I gave them to do...

So I gave them a helluva good talking!...

Yet Another Press Release From Ripkoff Investment Partners' Global Empire!

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Ripkoff Investment Partners Announces Its New Investment Card Game Initiative!
(07 Feb 2013; Toronto, New York, London, Tokyo, et cetera)

Ripkoff Investment Partners is proud to announce its new Card Game Initiative, launched immediately on Kickstarter.com.

As you know (unless you’re under a rock somewhere), Ripkoff Investment Partners is a humongous