Heard About Your Sudden Transfer...

John C,

Heard about your sudden transfer from the Field Office. Where is it they sent you? I heard some place out in the boonies... One of Ripkoff's more remote operations, mining or something? Or maybe the branch office of some grey, depressing city? Or was it the Ripkoff Corporate Retreat on that unnamed secluded South Pacific Island?

I'm sure we'll catch up soon, and I'll find out then...

I guess Mr Ripkoff didn't appreciate the critical videos. Ah well... You know how I feel about him... and that.

Remember that dingy old Field Office they tore down in 1970? That one in that building that TJ told us was actually the very first office, Full Stop, of Ripkoff Investment Partners?... Until they moved to a new city in 1970. That very first field office was in Toronto. Today, the Ripkoff Head Office is located in... Jeez... I was just at a baseball game there, last week.

What I don't understand is how that you and I were still operating out of the Field Office for so long?

I remember how you told me that a company hits its high-water mark when it plants its first skyscraper, as our founder, Mr TJ Ripkoff did in 1959. I remember that really clearly... the Ripkoff Tower going up then.

It really does seem to have been the Ripkoff high mark.

Today people seem to think they can preserve life in some bottle... Fooling themselves that they will never die. They don't know how important it is: that you not only have your life, but also that you *eat* your life. They're too goddamn "safe" John C. Too fucking safe.

Anyway...

Here's a stiff shot to you John C,

Tim K

Ripkoff Stories - The Press Conference

Trip on over to the Ripkoff Youtube channel and you'll see the latest rigmarole my inferiors have hacked together... (I don't know where they get off saying this whole card game was my idea...)

Sincerely, TJ Ripkoff

American Car Companies Are Truck Companies

I was looking at last Friday's New York Times, Auto Sales Rise 3.7%, Lifted by Upturn in Home Construction. It was way the car companies were ranked in terms of sales; GM was first, Ford was second and Chrysler was third ahead which had greater sales.

Kickstarter? Not To Worry! We Eat Failure For Lunch!

To all those Little Internet Nothings out there who took the time to donate to our card game project on this new-fangled Kickstarter thing - the project which I had my subordinates set-up... I just want to personally thank you. It takes a lot of guts to stand up for something when you're the only one on the field. When you're one of the new guys, or the "early adopters" (they tell me that's what they're called now).

Anyway, not to worry. I have instructed my subordinates to keep pushing the word out on what's the good and what's the bad in the world of investment - through our fledgling Youtube channel, through my Facebook page, and through other means we have yet to dream up. Who knows, we may run Kickstarter again in a year, or we may find other ways to get the word out. I hate to use a cliché, but now more than ever we need to inject plain old-fashioned kick-it-in-the-ass horse sense into the business world. (Their heads all seem to be spinning now.)

Once more, my hearty appreciation, and keep your eyeballs planted here to see what comes next.

Now I have a very important call to take...

TJ Ripkoff

The Lure of Sports

In my recent talks with TJ Ripkoff he was scathing about the overinvestment in sports by otherwise sane and well run organizations. "Executives who plaster the names of their companies across stadiums (sic), arenas, and ballparks will be spending more time in the future watching games and overpaying for advertising."

I was shocked at his assertion that only the most successful and profitable companies can afford the naming right to whole sports facilities.

Hello Mr Ripkoff

My staff weren't up to snuff on the card game project I gave them to do...

So I gave them a helluva good talking!...

Yet Another Press Release From Ripkoff Investment Partners' Global Empire!

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Ripkoff Investment Partners Announces Its New Investment Card Game Initiative!
(07 Feb 2013; Toronto, New York, London, Tokyo, et cetera)

Ripkoff Investment Partners is proud to announce its new Card Game Initiative, launched immediately on Kickstarter.com.

As you know (unless you’re under a rock somewhere), Ripkoff Investment Partners is a humongous